Mending a Broken Heart

Many dream of having a fairy tale romance, where love is professed through song and star-crossed lovers get to live happily ever after. However, real life takes place in a more complicated world. Here, a couple doesn't have a script to follow, which can ensure that they will get the ending that they want. There is a possibility for relationships to lead to heartbreak, and for others, the pain that it caused doesn't end when the other person walks away. The grief may endure, developing into what is called a relationship trauma.

Relationship trauma is manifested through experiences involving distressing thoughts or feelings and cognitive difficulties. Signs of relationship trauma include flashbacks of traumatic situations during the course of the relationship, feelings of fear or distress, guilt and shame, nightmares, and trust issues. Studies show that these are rooted in stressful life events and abusive and harmful behaviors that a person may have been exposed to.

Healing from a relationship trauma may take some time, but knowing what areas to focus on and what to do can ease the process. Here are some ways that can help return the strength of your resolve and lead the way forward:

1. Cultivate an environment where you can emotionally and physically express yourself, without fear of judgment.
2. Identify and establish boundaries so you can protect yourself as well as better manage your emotions and energy.
3. Build a support system consisting of individuals who you can trust.
4. Do not hesitate to communicate your needs with your loved ones. It is not a weakness to ask for assistance.
5. Engage in calming activities like listening to classical music, pilates or walking in nature.
6. Maintain a balanced and healthy diet, exercise regularly, and get at least 8 hours of sleep daily.
7. Get professional help if you feel like the burden is too great to bear on your own.

Getting over the pain caused by a failed relationship may not be easy, but having a safe space to inhabit and people whose hearts are filled with compassion and understanding can help greatly. Do things that will bring back the happiness that you've lost and don't shy away from letting your family and friends know if you need their guidance. Remember to take care of yourself and soon, you'll be back on your feet, stronger and wiser than ever.